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Celebrities keep ‘retiring.’ We sort the quitters from the fakers.

In Hollywood, where retirement is less of a life decision than a passing phase for some, Ellen DeGeneres has been remarkably consistent about her plans to quit entertainment forever.

She pulled the plug on her long-running talk show in 2022, after a toxic workplace scandal tarnished her image. She is now doing one last comedy tour for Netflix, literally called “Ellen’s Last Stand … Up.” On a tour stop in California this month, DeGeneres reiterated to the crowd, “This is the last time you’re going to see me. After my Netflix special, I’m done.”

And yet, they still doubt. A fan at the same show asked DeGeneres if she planned to return as Dory in a “Finding Nemo” film, so the legendary comedian resorted to baby talk: “No, I’m going bye-bye, remember.”

If no one believes her, it may not be her fault. The history of the U.S. entertainment industry is replete with cases of celebrities announcing they were quitting the industry, only to go back on their word.

End of carousel

The rapper formerly known as Kanye West — who won 24 Grammys before torching his reputation with antisemitic rants in 2022 and has announced three new albums since then — appeared to declare his retirement in a screenshot of a text conversation posted online by Ye’s musical collaborator, Rich the Kid, on July 9.

“I am retiring from professional music,” Ye allegedly wrote, as Rich tried to talk him out of it. “Not sure what else to do.”

Psych. Rich the Kid posted minutes later that he was releasing an album featuring Ye. The same day, it was announced that Ye would release a song with the rapper Consequence on July 12. It’s unclear if the texts about quitting were faked to build hype for the releases; Ye’s people did not reply to a request for comment.

Verdict: No retirement from Ye yet. Also, where is the “Yahndi” album?

What do you think?

Written by Herb Scribner

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